FAREWELL.

We had our farewell yesterday, It was weird. The 11th graders had done a wonderful job in arranging everything and we had an informal award's ceremony and every twelfth grader got an award. I got the 'Rockstar' award. The guys of our grade had been discussing and debating on what to wear for the farewell and we all decided that we'd wear a suit and sport a formal look. The girls wore sarees. Everybody looked really good. I wore a new suit, and felt awesome wearing it. I felt like a big person. And I finally got to click a picture with Shruti :D. The farewell was like a dream, everybody clicking pictures with everybody else, people getting emotional, hugging each other. I felt really weird. There was this ''sinking'' sorta feeling that I had. I still cannot believe that my school life is over. When I was younger, I used to look up to my seniors in the 12th grade and to me they felt like mature, big people. But surprisingly I dont get that feeling now. I cant believe the fact that the routine that I have been following, is over. The friends that I have made here are as close as family, and I know that it's almost impossible to get friends like these. After the farewell, I went out to have dinner with a few of my friends, at 11:00, came back only at 1:40. Time flies when I am with these people, I am happy, I laugh like crazy. I dont want this to get over. And BTW when I came home THAT late, I got screamed at by my mom and my dad, had my phone taken away. But I dont feel bad about that. Wish I could live my school life again, I feel like I took things for granted. I dont even know what undergraduate course to take up after my boards, The future looks astonishingly uncertain, but I am gonna follow my heart and do what makes me happy.

Boards :/

It's 02:30 AM and I have my CBSE Computer Science Board Practicals in the morning. All my friends, even the ones that are usually carefree about exams, called me up, nervous and scared about the practical. I spent the day trying to complete my Physics record. I really don't like C++, it makes me yawn. I understand that the invention of this language was very important to the current world or computers, but back then those folks didnt have such an awesome world of internet (read facebook, youtube, online gaming) to distract them. Its sad that even those things are based on C++.  Some of my friends find C++ exciting, one of my friends interacts with the computer while writing programs (thats what it looks like), Individuality is a very fascinating thing. Sooo! I was supposed to study today (atleast!) because it's the BOARD practical, but I end up listening to music and reading about stuff on the internet that fascinates me (movies, for now!). I don't know why i am so random, and why I cant plan things, or stick to a plan. I wish I was organised, have tried also, doesnt work out though. I am not even sleepy right now, thanks to the big cuppa coffee :) Imma read through the programs that we're supposed to know by heart and sleep :P. Habit is a bitch. I always fantasize about me transforming into this super studious, sincere, organised person, but I always end up being, me :/ I HATE studying for exams, because when you are trying to study, even the matrimonial supplementary of the newspaper seems much more interesting. I am such an idiot, I am supposed to be scared and nervous right now, but I am chilled. I don't really like this. Will study as much as possible. Imma try telling myself again and again that I loveee C++ :P
Hoping for the best, and trying to be prepared for the worst.
Love,
Shyam
PS: "Namita, you're awesome." you frickin wannabe :P